It’s a decision most parents will have to make sooner or later. When is it time to get your children their own phones? Most experts recommend waiting until they’re somewhere between 11 and 13. By that age, kids feel left out if all their friends have phones and they don’t.

Before you get that phone, though, it’s important to make some agreements beforehand. Here’s what’s experts recommend:

• Talk about the rules and expectations. Maybe they’re not allowed to use it after 9:00 PM. Or perhaps you don’t want them to watch videos, because they’ll use up your data. The rules are up to you. The important thing is that you make sure you both agree to them beforehand.

• Make it part of the deal that you get the passwords to all their social media accounts. If they want their own phone,  that’s the agreement.

• Talk frankly about sexting. Even if they send pictures of somebody else, they can still get in big trouble for it. Explain why that’s a big deal. And get ready for some serious eye-rolling. But it’s a conversation you have have.

• Talk about cyber-bullying. Make sure your kids know what it is, and make them promise to tell you about anyone bullying them online. Also make them promise never to meet up with anybody they meet online.

• Make sure they realize that having their own phone is a big responsibility. These things are expensive! Make sure they understand that you expect them to make good decisions and that you’re putting a lot of trust in them.

• Make sure they understand that this is really your phone. You’re paying for it, you’re the adult on the account, and you can take it back whenever you want.